Sexual Health Network - credentialed experts providing sexuality education from pleasure and orgasm to sexually transmitted diseases, sexual dysfunction, and sex and disability




The Sexual Health Network is dedicated to providing easy access to sexuality information, education, support, and other resources.

	contact us \| privacy policy \| Mon Dec 01 2008

print this page

Question:
My girlfriend and I were both virgins when we decided to engage in sexual intercourse. The first few times it hurt momentarily when I entered and at first, then she said the pain went away. After then she said it would only hurt for a few seconds when I first entered and there has never been any bleeding. For a few weeks we had sexual intercourse regularly, 4-5 times a week, then stopped for over a week when she got her period. After this week or so of no intercourse we decided to have sex and she said that it hurt quite a bit, like the first time and there was some vaginal bleeding and she reported soreness later that night. A few nights after this incident, I tried to insert two fingers inside of her which never hurt after the first time we had intercourse and it hurt this night. Why is she bleeding after we've had sex numerous time and why does she experience pain in the beginning. There's plenty of lubrication

Answer:
by Scott Gross: (09/02/2005)
Hi and thanks for your question. Although you've had intercourse a few times now with little pain on her part, a few things may have changed in the intervening week when she had her period. First, having her period may have caused some of her vaginal and pelvic muscles to tighten up and so it might now be a little bit more uncomfortable for her to be penetrated either by fingers or a penis. Secondly, she may be stressed or anxious about something like work, school, pregnancy, or STI's, or anything else imaginable. This could cause her muscles to tighten up and cause her to have some pain. The bleeding could either be because of her period or just due to some tissue breakdown due to the tightness in her vagina. There are a large number of blood vessels in the penis and vagina which can sometimes tear pretty easily. If she is experiencing a large amount of blood though, then she should see a doctor. So what can you do about this? You can try some relaxation and massage before you have intercourse. Slow things down and take it easy. Make sure she's really relaxed and really ready to have intercourse. If she's not feeling the mood or really, really well lubricated then she might have this tightness and pain and I'm sure neither of you want that. However, if this persists, or gets worse then she should see a doctor who might refer her to a sex therapist because it could be an indication of a condition called vaginismus, or painful intercourse. There are very specific medical techniques used to treat vaginismus. Vaginismus is a condition which can be very painful and actually make intercourse impossible (the vaginal muscle tightens so much that you cannot even insert a finger or tampon into the vagina). Best of luck to you, and don't hesitate to ask any other questions you might have. Take care, Scott Gross

Reviewed by: Patricia Fawver Ph.D. in Sexology

This question appears in the following topics: