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Question:
My girlfriend frightened to leave me tonight. Reason was my penis was too large for her causing pain and harming her. Please help me with your advice. I am desperate - she is the love of my life. I read Dr. Ghenem's answer to other peson's question about penile reduction which had made me even more desperate. Pleawse give me some hope!
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Answer:
by Robert Birch: ()
Some genitals do not fit well together initially. Women can at times adjust to a penis that feels too big, but not always. This can, therefore, be a serious problem.
The situation can be made worse if the woman experiences pain and then begins to reflexively tighten when penetration is attempted. Thus, both partners might contribute to the problem and it takes both partners to work it out.
When intercourse is painful, obviously it does no good to force it. This only causes more pain, and more pain will stir more anxiety and cause more avoidance.
The place to being is by working on the relaxation and making sex fun again. Lots of mutual oral pleasuring takes the pressure off penile/vaginal intercourse. Also, rather than penetrating, I would recommend "outercourse" for a while. With the man lying on his back, his partner can straddle him and slide her external genital along the underside of his erection.
As comfort with sexual play returns, gradual and brief penetration can be attempted, but only with the woman's consent.
There aren't any easy answers, but loving and creative couples do seem to work around these genital mismatches.Reviewed by: Patricia Fawver Ph.D. in Sexology
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